Anyway, as I say my quest to put the ‘man’ back into manicure has proved less than popular with two key groups, essential to the ventures eventual success; investors with money and more generally, people with ears. I’m a little annoyed to be honest, I had a tag line ready to go and everything: ‘Hard As Nailz: There’s nothing cute about our cuticles.’ Now all that potential has gone to waste just because of ‘obvious health and safety concerns’ whatever that’s supposed to mean. I mean it's not like we wouldn't have procedures in place for worst case scenarios. I'm not stupid. Like for example if you come to get your 'nailz' done and one of our nail technicians gets a little over excited and maims or kills you then you get 50% of the price of this visit and a coupon for a free manicure next time round. If we slash your face, then we slash your bill, that's the Hard As Nailz promise!
Nobody ever seems to like my inventions man. Gets me down sometimes, y’know? I’m only consoled by the fact that, like all true geniuses (is that how you spell that? Oh the irony if it’s not) I won’t be properly appreciated until I’m dead. Which, yeah okay I’ll admit it, if ‘Hard As Nailz’ ever opened and I went there, there's a chance that may be sooner rather than later.
*If it isn’t then it should be. Sort it out Oxford English Dictionary.